24r

Unfortunately in the past 2 1/2 months I have laid both my parents to rest. Most recently my father just this past week. The tragedy of their deaths is that they probably could have been prevented. If you have a loved one and all of a sudden they start to change their regular habits or routines. Please ask then questions as to why. If my father had done this with my mother a few years earlier she could be still with us today. She had colon cancer and my father didn't ask the questions he should have. He also did not tell myself or my sister the signs he had seen until she was gone.

As for my father he had actually told the doctor some of his symtoms but the doctor put it down to his diabetes. Which it wasn't in the end. The tragedy here as we started to cleanup parts of the house I found news paper articles referring to prostate cancer, which is what killed him. It appears that he had a good idea that he had a problem but did nothing about it.

So please if you see a relative friend change their habits or complain about various ailments fo your best to get them to see a doctor. It will help possible save them and possibly save yourself some major upset.


Mark

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gospodin

My sympathies for your losses. Losing parents isn't any easier knowing they are elderly and near the end of their lives...it seems we all harbor a secret hope that our loved ones are immortal. Your father may have accepted his disease in part because he lost your mother, and that may have been why he never discussed it with you. But he took his reason with him, and I feel for you that you've lost them both in such a short time. I hope you find peace eventually after this hard time.

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1:200Freak

My sympathies for your loss as well.

Roarer

Sorry to hear of your loss, I personally can only begin to imagine the amount of physical pain cancer causes because I have been exceptionally lucky with my Leukaemia so far.

What I have thought about however is if they were to turn round tomorrow and tell me something like I only have 6 months to live. The feelings of guilt at leaving your loved ones and causing so much grief to them must be at it's worst, quite unbearable. I've always thought that it must actually be quite embarrassing or uncomfortable, knowing that you are going to cause them all this pain. It's something to tell them that you don't want them to be too upset, etc, but it is quite another for them to to do this!! And that's not even starting on contemplating your own mortality and your impending death. what your final actions or words will be, and also on planning your own funeral, etc etc.
So many complex emotions!

I've known a few people, mainly young, who have died, so I have seen it played out before.

I really feel for you!

I might appear to be quite insensetive at times, but don't let that fool you, I do care really. I'm just unsentimental and shmaltzy, that's all.

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MarinerOne

Mark, my sincerest condolences on your losses recently. I will be facing this dilemma some day in the future, and will remember your story as I contend with the same issues.

Peace be with you, your family and your loving parents. I'm sure that they will be in 'peace' knowing that you cared so much for them and are willing to share their stories with others in trying to help others with such practical advice.

God bless, and may you find strength in Mr. J!

M1