V953

Folks,

Here goes......


An Englishman is being shown round a military hospital in Edinburgh during the First World War. At the end of his visit, he is ushered into a ward with a number of patients who show no obvious signs of injury. He goes to examine the first man he sees, and the man sits up and proclaims - “Fair fa yer honest sonsie face, great chieftain o’ the puddin’ race ! Aboot them a’ ye tak yer place, painch, tripe or thairm. Weel are ye wordy o’ a grace, as lang as ma erm !

The Englishman, somewhat taken aback, goes to the next patient, who immediately launches into “Some hae meat, and canna eat, and some wad eat that want it, But we hae meat and we can eat, an’ sae the Lord be thankit !

This continues with the next patient - “Wee sleekit cow’rin tim’rous beastie, O what a panic’s in thy breastie ! Thou need na start awa sae hasty, Wi bickerin’ brattle I wad be laith tae run
an chase thee, Wi murderin’ prattle !

“Well”, the Englishman mutters to his Scottish colleague, “I see you saved the psychiatric ward for last”. “Och no, the Scottish doctor corrected him, “This is the Serious Burns unit.”


Bill

Eddy Two

Bill, very funny joke but I think that the chances of it raising a titter here are very slim. I have heard the same joke before buut substitute the English man for Tony Blair.

I told this to many people while I lived in Australia and New Zealand and absolutely nobody got it.

I guess Rabbie Burns ain't as popular or well known around the world as he is here.......

Still, let's explain :

Robbie Burns is a famous Scottish poet (hence Burns Night in Scotland) and he wrote peoms which include the lines written above....... You get it now????

V953

Eddy,

I figured there may be some Americans/Canadians/Ozzies/Kiwis out there who have heard of him - plus this site is not a total US hang out !

Have you noticed over here in the UK that celibrating his birthday seems to be gaining in popularity - any excuse to dress up and get drunk !

Did you partake of the haggis and the water of life last weekend Eddy ?

Bill

ANTHONY F DUVA JR

Haggis!
I got a standing ovation when I recited my story about the haggis, in ninth grade, after sampling one in Edinburgh. In fact, my nickname was "Haggis" for a while. I liked these parts the best: The Scots like to tell tourists that a haggis is a rare animal and they describe how to hunt it. Sort of like a highland snipe hunt. The second part had to do with not filling the bag too much before you put it in the pot to boil, or else it will explode and you will have sheep guts all over the place ! I still have my haggis recipe but, quite frankly, I never really developed a taste for this meal. I prefer coc kaleekie myself !

Slainte!

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ANTHONY F DUVA JR

Eddy ... Eddy ! Next time you visit the US, stop in Albany and check out the statue of Robert Burns we have in Washington Park.

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AlphaSigOU

Not only that, but he is revered by Scottish Masons as much as George Washington is to American Masons. You'll always see a portrait of him hung in a place of honor in any Scottish Masonic Lodge.

The Masonic lodge I belonged to when I was living in Tulsa (Will Rogers #53, Claremore, Oklahoma, mother lodge of American humorist and entertainer Will Rogers) did a Robert Burns night last year and was well attended. Complete with the piper and the traditional cutting of the haggis. Alas, we had to dispense with the single malt, since most American Masonic lodges prohibit alcohol.

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Chuck Corway (AlphaSigOU)

Causa latet vis est notissima -- the cause is hidden, the results are well known.

James Bond: "I'll take the full odds on the ten, two hundred on the hard way, the limit on all the numbers, two hundred and fifty on the eleven, thank you very much."

Plenty O'Toole: "Hey! You've played this game before!"

James Bond: "Just once."

REMEMBER THE ALAMO!!! REMEMBER PEARL HARBOR!!! REMEMBER SEPTEMBER 11!!!!